Online Dating For Over 40

Online Dating For Over 40

Let’s be blunt: dating at 40 isn’t the same as dating at 20. But not for the reasons you might think. It’s not because you’re older, pickier, or that the dating pool has shrunk. The dating pool is the same; and as for your age, well, you’re just a bit older and way more impatient. Nobody blames you for that. At 40, the trick to having a bullshit-free dating experiences is simple: change your mindset, attitude, and approach.

Increasingly, the over-40 set is getting in on the action. But diving into online dating past a certain age can be overwhelming. Thankfully, our experts have put together 20 tips to make for a. 11 Reasons Why Online Dating Can Be Frustrating After 40 January is the busiest month for online dating sites. Yet, many people over 40 will never sign up or quit after a short time.

  1. Discover Over 40 Friends date a completely free over 40 dating site for singles over 40 years old. Free over 40 single date community and personals club. Meet single men and women over 40 online now.
  2. In this blog we continue with Part 2 of online dating success for those of you women over 40. Part 1 covered the importance of the photo in great detail. Today, you’ll learn five more specific tips that have helped many over 40s women achieve online dating success.

Read these straight-up tips about dating when you’re 40 and single to approach things the right way:

1. Stop caring so much.
Easier said than done, obviously. But there’s truth to this whole not-caring thing. Good things come to those who have even better things to care about. Now you might be thinking, “What’s more important than finding love?” That’s where your thinking is wrong.

If your biggest care in life is finding love, that means your biggest priority isn’t YOU. People who have active, satisfying lives are the most inspiring and attractive people. But if you’re always in self-pity mode, sulking around and hating your singleness, you’re not going to attract positive people.

People you’ve just met don’t like feeling responsible to renew your faith in dating. You’re not an empty vessel who needs to be rescued; so take care of yourself first! When you’re 40 and single, focus on being fabulously 40 and single. This mindset will empower you to date with more confidence.

2. Create and attract positive energy.
Positive people attract each other—and yes, The Law of Attraction is real. Newsflash to any skeptics or anti-spiritualists out there, the Law of Attraction really is a LAW—like actually, it’s quantum physics!

But let’s not bore you with the nerdy details and keep it simple: Brain imaging studies prove that when we feel someone’s amazing energy, our brain mirrors those feelings, “as though you are actually doing these things,” says Award-winning Neuroscientist, Srinivasan Pillay in Huffington Post.

Online Dating For Over 40

No wonder we’re naturally drawn to positive people. We all want to feel that positive energy, especially from others. So ditch any sourness or pessimism you may have about dating at 40. It’ll only turn people away.

3. Avoid one night stands.
Sure, one night stands can be hot. But are they hot enough to sacrifice a meaningful relationship? Some singles believe that they can have it all: relish the thrills of one-nighters and still keep their hopes open for something deeper. There’s only one problem with this logic…

Again, we’ll revisit The Law of Attraction. You get what you put out. So if you’re indulging in meaningless sex, you shut down your relationship-attracting energy. You’re not genuinely practicing the lifestyle of someone who values love, making you more unlikely to find it.

Online dating for over 40

4. Believe actions, not words.
Age-old and foolproof, the rule of seeking actions over words never gets stale. Just because you’re 40, the singles don’t magically get designated with a maturity badge or a diploma in honesty.

So stay sharp when you date and don’t take people’s words so seriously. They might claim to want a serious, meaningful relationship, but how do you know? They might even dazzle you with tales of their noble integrity or sob stories about how their ex hurt them. Maybe they seem super sincere when they say they’re looking for the one. Take it with a grain of salt, and wait and see if their actions match up to their words.

5. Don’t air your dirty dating laundry.
Everyone has dating problems. Don’t advertise yours. When you’re dating, set the negativity aside and put your best self forward.

No matter how bad the baggage may be, don’t talk about it. Or imagine how you’d feel, listening to someone air their dirty laundry. Do you want to hear about how their dad’s in jail or that their landlord is a psycho? These stories don’t make your life seem more interesting; they make you seem unstable.

Even minor stuff, like why you hate your ex, should be off limits. These stories suck the energy out of the date.

6. Avoid Mr. or Miss player on dating apps.
Sifting through the nonsense is easy. You just need to turn up your jerk radar and make better choices. Tons of people, both men and women, complain about using dating apps at 40. But usually, it’s not the apps— it’s your judgement that needs a little work. You’re just not seeing the signs.

The clearest signs that someone may be a player are revealed in the first five minutes of chatting. Here’s a big one: if they say they’re only casually looking to date, believe them. You won’t magically change their mind. Here’s another sign: if they’re overly flirty or worse, ask for sexy pics. Just delete these people. Unless they’re asking you thoughtful questions about your career, values and interests, forget them.

Stop cutting people so much slack. Don’t ever think that you need to dole out more chances because you might regret losing out on potential. There’s no potential with these clowns and you’re not desperate enough to flush away your time finding out. Instead, look at the truth right in front of you. It’ll bring you closer to finding what you desire.

7. Make your dating goals clear.
Always make sure the person you’re dating knows your dating goals. There’s a myth that it’s more attractive to act cool and pretend you’re not looking for anything serious. Apparently, admitting to wanting something more could be a turnoff. What the heck?

That’s like walking into a clinic and not telling your doctor what you’re feeling because you’re worried he’ll feel too much pressure to cure you. It’s the same twisted logic. If someone is truly interested in something special, they won’t get turned off from knowing you want the same. Anyone who does has commitment issues. You don’t need to these dysfunctional narcissists in your life. Let their therapist deal with them.

Dating at 40 isn’t that different from dating at any other age. The only difference is that you’ve got more experience, better taste and hopefully, a lower tolerance for bullshit. You already know what you deserve. Act on it.

Subscribe to our newsletter

By clicking Submit you agree to Zoosk’s terms of use and privacy policy.

It’s never too late to date, however that may not always feel true when it comes to dating in this day and age. Whether you’re recently divorced, widowed, or are just finally ready to date again, exploring the big world of online dating can be overwhelming. For some people over 40, going online may not be the most natural or comfortable or familiar way to date, but it seems like it’s the only way to meet anyone anymore.

If you’re online dating after 40, here are some helpful tips for how to approach it and have a great time:

Dating

Find the right site for you.
An important piece of online dating is choosing the sites or app that works for you. Not everyone is made for Tinder, and Tinder is not made for everyone. There are ample dating apps and websites that will fit your style, your taste, and your interests. Find the right one that works with your dating style and what you’re looking for.

Reconsider your type.
Especially if it’s been awhile since you’ve dated, it’s important to redefine what you think your type is. You might come across a lot more people than you’re used to while online dating. If you dated before and haven’t been at it in awhile, you may get overwhelmed with the number of people that there really are when you log on. In the past, did you only date men who had never been married, or didn’t have kids? Or did you only go for women who were brunettes? It’s important to throw those little things out the window when you’re online dating and be open to different types of people. The world can feel a lot bigger online, so getting stuck on something like hair color is not the best approach.

Keep your standards.
That being said, don’t lower your standards just because you now have access to so many different kinds of people. It’s wonderful if you can strike up a conversation online with someone who owns a dog grooming business even though you consider yourself a cat person, but you don’t want to lower your standards on the important stuff. Stay true to what you believe in politically, religiously, and with the major subjects like morals and values. You will come across a lot of people that don’t meet your personal standards while online dating—and it’s okay to scroll on by.

Try not to get down on yourself.
Are there younger people on dating apps? Yes. Does that mean you don’t have a chance? No. Dating data shows that men in their 40s typically match with women who are two years younger than them. So though there are some gender norms at play, that’s really not much of an age difference. Likewise, women in their 40s tend to match with men who are three years older. Being over 40 means you have the emotional maturity and life experience that many young people have yet to gain. Other daters are looking for that and looking for you.

Use real and recent pictures.
Over 40 or not, it can be tempting to use a picture where you look younger, fitter, happier, more vibrant; a picture with fewer gray hairs and wrinkles. The truth is, your online dating profile should be a reflection of who you are right now. You may have more smile lines than you used to but that certainly doesn’t diminish the fact that you are happy, healthy, and lovelier than ever. Use that picture your best friend snapped over happy hour last week, or the one where you’re holding your daughter’s hand at her middle school graduation. Use pictures that show the real you in your real life. You are much more likely to attract someone you’re interested in if you’re being your true self.

Remember, you’re not alone.
It’s important to remember that you’re not the only one who’s new to online dating. Online dating and dating apps are not second nature for most people. If you find it awkward or hard to navigate, remember that the people you’re matching with and talking to likely feel the same way .

Date a few people.
If you find yourself chatting with more than one person (even on more than one dating website), don’t feel like you have to limit yourself. It’s absolutely okay to meet up with a few different people and see who you have the best vibe with. It may be out of your comfort zone to line up multiple dates over a few weeks, but you’re already trying something new with online dating. Leaning into it and having the full experience is worth it.

Set a date.
Speaking of dating a few people, one of the most important parts of online dating is actually setting a date to meet in person. Often times, people will end up chatting for weeks without ever making a plan. That’s a surefire way for the initial chemistry to sizzle. If you like someone, reach out and suggest meeting up for a drink or dinner.

Pick the right place.
When you do finally set that first date, make sure you’re picking a place that makes sense for you, or agreeing to meet at a place you feel comfortable in. It may be tempting to meet somewhere young and fresh, but if you think you’ll feel out of place and uncomfortable, it may not be the best first date of your life. It’s okay to pick a quieter bar on a Thursday night rather than a raucous one on a Saturday. Be true to yourself and the date will go that much smoother.

Make the first move.
Nobody wants to make the first move, but if you don’t put yourself out there, online dating will be much harder. If you’re shy it may be unfamiliar to send the first message or suggest the first date or offer up your phone number first, but someone has to do it. It might as well be you! Online dating can be clunky and strange at first, but if you put yourself out there and show your interest, you’ll meet someone great.. So be bold! You deserve it.

Online Dating For Over 50

Online dating certainly seems like the way of the future. If you’re over 40 and new to the big world of internet dating, welcome. Once you get the hang of it, you’ll even find yourself having a little fun.

Subscribe to our newsletter

Online Dating For Over 40

By clicking Submit you agree to Zoosk’s terms of use and privacy policy.